June 8, 2004


The other day I recounted some disturbing dreams which weren't fading from my mind. Using this blog as a vehicle to dispel some of the disquiet seemed to work. Sometimes simply putting stuff out there helps me deal with the angst. Just talking about it seems to take the power out of dark thoughts. Maybe because in doing so, without me even knowing, there are those who listen, and send some of their light to dispel the fear. Thanks to those of you who did.

Today, I had an appointment with the gastro guy. I’d been feeling like hell for a while …and this weekend indigestion got intense. This guy is a generally nice man, and though I hadn’t seen him for a couple of years, I felt like I was in good hands.

An endoscopy was scheduled for Thursday morning. It was either then or wait a couple of weeks till the doctor returns from vacation.

Before I started second guessing the doctor and my decision to follow his advice, I went with Thursday. On the way home, I started thinking of who I might ask to take me to and from the procedure. There is something about asking for help that always touches feelings of guilt and fear within me.

I decided to act as soon as I got home to prevent too much over thinking. Then, made a small list of people who lived close-by and who I thought might be home this week. I left messages to call me on the machines of three women in our Spiritual Family. Within an hour, I received the first call. This beautiful soul immediately told me that she would be happy to drive.

An hour later, I received a second call. When I told this kind woman why I had called, she too let me know that she was available. I took a deep breath. …And, realized once again, that we don’t have to be alone. All we need to do is reach out. Someone is always willing to lend a hand.

How easy it is to forget….

By the way... We meet the nicest people on the internet. This person has a lot of insight and a very cool blog as well.

Posted by Judi at June 8, 2004 9:00 PM | TrackBack

Good luck on the endoscopy. I'm only 30 but I had one a few years back. I have a lot of gastro troubles. My whole family does. The endo's nothing. It's the other end I'm scared of!

Posted by: justjenn at June 9, 2004 8:10 PM
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